For those of you that don't know my story, i'll briefly mention that around 9 years ago I was on track to moving up within the Southern Baptist denomination and becoming a pastor, possibly even planting a new church in New Orleans. But everything sort of came to a halt upon embracing "Calvinism".
I then got involved with some non-southernbaptist churches, including a postmill Baptist church that subscribed to the London Baptist confession (calvinistic). I was on track there of becoming the next pastor, going through training, teaching, etc., etc.
But all that came to a screeching halt upon embracing full preterism. Not only was i booted from the church, but i suffered a severe knee injury and had no income coming in. Eventually, i ended up in bankruptcy and in Florida working for an appraisal company, the only job i had offered to me at the time. (hard to find work with a leg in a brace)
I have been down here for 4 years. I love it down here, but it is expensive considering i have four children to care for - certainly in comparison to Alabama. So far, my pay has kept me alive, even slowing increasing. Future looked good. But now, unfortunately, we are in one of the worst market conditions in over 20 years. Our business has almost come to a halt and we may be within 2 to 3 weeks of shutting down. Also, we currently live in a rental home that we will be forced to leave within a few months.
A huge part of me wants to make things work here, especially because of the fellowship i have with others who have come to accept me and my preterism. (some preterists themselves, some not) But another part of me wants to get into a cheaper area. My wife is pushing to move to the Alabama/Tennessee area.
Of course, i'll have to find new work regardless of where i go (no college degree) and with bankruptcy still on my record. i don't have any trades/specialties because i spent a good deal of my life preparing for future ministry. All that has pretty much went down the tube.
And it's not like the old days where i could visit an area, plug into a church, and get help/leads there.
My doctrine is a barrier for many Christians. In fact, it was my doctrine that got me booted on the street 4 years ago to start with and caused a majority vote in my church to decline any financial aid to us when i sliced my knee open and couldn't work.
anywho, I really don't know what to do. It's starting to depress me some. God's sovereignty does bring me comfort, but then there are times when i wander if the sovereignty is working against me...i've wandered if i have brought all this upon myself, perhaps some punishment for holding to certain beliefs that i do. On the other hand, i won't violate conscience simply to "make friends" and get life in order.
anywho, just some thoughts. If it was just Amanda and I, i wouldn't be so concerned. We have roughed it out before. But i have four little ones in my care and not too many people i can turn to.
thanks for listening.
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