PDA

View Full Version : Prayer needed. Advice is welcomed.



Rikki
07-25-2008, 12:16 PM
In the past month, a woman and her children moved in across the street. No big deal. I smile and wave...keep it moving.

Last Friday, I'm out with Jules and my mom, and my best friend calls me to tell me she thinks she saw the sperm donor leaving that house.

ORLY?

So this week she talks to the woman and discretely asks her if that was him. Yep. Sure was. She's his best friend. And he'll be back the day after tomorrow for a cookout.

I don't hate him. My only issue with him is the fact that he acts like his child doesn't exist.

For the first time, in the past month, my child asked me what his father looked like. I have a picture which is 9 years old. I showed it to him. Jules did meet him when he was four, but he can't remember that.

So..I sat my son down and explained to him that his father MIGHT be visiting the people across the street. I asked him if he wanted to meet him, if he was there. He told me yes. So...I'll do my best to make sure that happens. I just hope my baby doesn't think his father is gonna BE a father...cuz he'll be disappointed. I've been through that disappointment with my own father, and I don't want my son to go through that. But I suppose I can't protect him from everything.

*sigh*

thankfull
07-25-2008, 04:01 PM
In the past month, a woman and her children moved in across the street. No big deal. I smile and wave...keep it moving.

Last Friday, I'm out with Jules and my mom, and my best friend calls me to tell me she thinks she saw the sperm donor leaving that house.

ORLY?

So this week she talks to the woman and discretely asks her if that was him. Yep. Sure was. She's his best friend. And he'll be back the day after tomorrow for a cookout.

I don't hate him. My only issue with him is the fact that he acts like his child doesn't exist.

For the first time, in the past month, my child asked me what his father looked like. I have a picture which is 9 years old. I showed it to him. Jules did meet him when he was four, but he can't remember that.

So..I sat my son down and explained to him that his father MIGHT be visiting the people across the street. I asked him if he wanted to meet him, if he was there. He told me yes. So...I'll do my best to make sure that happens. I just hope my baby doesn't think his father is gonna BE a father...cuz he'll be disappointed. I've been through that disappointment with my own father, and I don't want my son to go through that. But I suppose I can't protect him from everything.

*sigh*

wow....praying for you. I know it's got to be hard. Does your neighbor know that he is your son's father and does your son's father know that you live across the street?

Rikki
07-25-2008, 04:12 PM
wow....praying for you. I know it's got to be hard. Does your neighbor know that he is your son's father and does your son's father know that you live across the street?
Thank you.

To answer your questions....no. and no.

My son hasn't seen the man since a family court date 4 years ago..and he doesn't even remember meeting him.

Gloria
07-28-2008, 01:39 PM
I'll be praying for you Rikki.

Rikki
07-28-2008, 01:47 PM
Thanks Gloria.

Well..the weekend came and went, with no sign of him. I'm not pressed, just making sure my child is ok. And he is.

eternal
08-01-2008, 01:17 AM
I will be praying too. I know its hard, but keep your grace and composure. The Lord will provide you discernment as to how to interact with him as you steady your heart and thoughts in Christ.

Rikki
08-07-2008, 09:00 AM
So, yesterday, about a week after he SAID he was coming, he showed up unexpectedly.

Everything was cool. My son was his normal happy self. He interacted well with his father. He did very well considering this was really his first time meeting him.

I didn't have a bad attitude. I talked with him, no snide remarks. He seemed genuinely happy to be around my son. (not that it means he'll support him financially).

I took a picture of them together. Figured my son would like that.

He says he wants to come back today to see him. We'll see.

Now all I have to do is keep rejecting his advances..which won't be difficult, just irritating.

Thanks for your prayers! Keep'em up!

nubia7
08-07-2008, 09:45 AM
Glad to hear everything went pretty well with your son meeting his father. i will continue to pray for you guys.

clayfilms
08-07-2008, 09:58 AM
hey sis..i just prayed that God would sbundantly shower you and your son with His limitless grace and that He'd help you to live day by day as a light to your son's father...and i'm also praying for your son's father..God can save all kinds of folk..i just read psalm 107 and that thought came to mind. be blessed!!

thankfull
08-07-2008, 02:53 PM
So, yesterday, about a week after he SAID he was coming, he showed up unexpectedly.

Everything was cool. My son was his normal happy self. He interacted well with his father. He did very well considering this was really his first time meeting him.

I didn't have a bad attitude. I talked with him, no snide remarks. He seemed genuinely happy to be around my son. (not that it means he'll support him financially).

I took a picture of them together. Figured my son would like that.

He says he wants to come back today to see him. We'll see.

Now all I have to do is keep rejecting his advances..which won't be difficult, just irritating.

Thanks for your prayers! Keep'em up!

Thanks for the update. I will continue to pray for you all. :biggrin:

eternal
08-11-2008, 06:53 PM
So, yesterday, about a week after he SAID he was coming, he showed up unexpectedly.

Everything was cool. My son was his normal happy self. He interacted well with his father. He did very well considering this was really his first time meeting him.

I didn't have a bad attitude. I talked with him, no snide remarks. He seemed genuinely happy to be around my son. (not that it means he'll support him financially).

I took a picture of them together. Figured my son would like that.

He says he wants to come back today to see him. We'll see.

Now all I have to do is keep rejecting his advances..which won't be difficult, just irritating.

Thanks for your prayers! Keep'em up!

Thanks for this great news. God will continue to carry you, and mold you in His image. Your faithfulness to His will and humility are tremendous testimonies. Thank you for this encouragement.

the answer
08-11-2008, 07:10 PM
Just so I'm clear...are u using "sperm doner" as a word for dad? Or was he really the sperm doner? He was your husband or boyfriend in the past? Was a bit confused...lol


its Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29Eph. 4:29

Rikki
08-11-2008, 10:56 PM
I am using sperm donor as the word for "man I slept with who never really took an interest in his child".

Rikki
08-11-2008, 11:02 PM
Update:

He came back the next day (last Thursday) and we (he, my son and I) played Uno and Trouble together. Then my son went outside on the porch to play his DS, and his father went outside, sat next to him and just watched him play.

My mother came down to meet him (she never had before), and she behaved herself. In fact, she started talking to him about spiritual matters. I interjected and shared the Gospel in a way that he could relate to. He said he understood what I shared with him, and he even stayed for a long while after my mom left just to talk about random stuff.

I exchanged a few texts with him on Friday..but that's the last I've heard from him.

Ya'll..just pray for him. He is thoroughly confused about what God expects of us, and the enemy is REALLY working on him. But one thing he did say is that he knows God is dealing with him. Whether that's true or not, he seriously needs prayer.

eternal
08-12-2008, 12:53 AM
Amen! Seems prayers are really being answered. Let's continue to keep God's will uplifted in our hearts, minds, and actions.

thankfull
08-12-2008, 10:44 AM
wow...I'm praying.