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View Full Version : This is deep.........for the ladies!!!!



Danielle
03-15-2007, 01:43 PM
Wow, I am reading this awesome book about marriage, and in the book a phenomenal statement was issued.... as single women when we are desiring to marry a particular man we should ask ourselves " Would you want that man to be the head of you and make ALL of your decisions?"such a simple question, yet still so profound..........I think back on all of the relationships that I have had and I thank God that we spared me from marrying some of the men from my past, because it is crazy to think that those men would have been the leaders of our household....

Another interesting thought is this, marriage does not change anyone, so if you were to marry that man today, and him not change a lick would you be happy for the rest of your life, or would you be miserable.......

Love is not enough....it takes much more to make a marriage work.......:eek:

Single Eye
03-15-2007, 01:50 PM
Wow, I am reading this awesome book about marriage, and in the book a phenomenal statement was issued.... as single women when we are desiring to marry a particular man we should ask ourselves " Would you want that man to be the head of you and make ALL of your decisions?"such a simple question, yet still so profound..........I think back on all of the relationships that I have had and I thank God that we spared me from marrying some of the men from my past, because it is crazy to think that those men would have been the leaders of our household....

Another interesting thought is this, marriage does not change anyone, so if you were to marry that man today, and him not change a lick would you be happy for the rest of your life, or would you be miserable.......

Love is not enough....it takes much more to make a marriage work.......:eek:

it takes God to change a man....if a woman can understand this before marriage, she's got a good foundation...TRUST& OBEY is the hardest principle i'm finding as a christian wife...such a struggle! But God is in control!

Danielle
03-15-2007, 02:09 PM
it takes God to change a man....if a woman can understand this before marriage, she's got a good foundation...TRUST& OBEY is the hardest principle i'm finding as a christian wife...such a struggle! But God is in control!

SE, to be honest my hardest points that I know for me is TRUST and OBEDIENCE.......now I know why I am not married, I am not ready yet.....

lisajames96
03-15-2007, 02:12 PM
Wow, I am reading this awesome book about marriage, and in the book a phenomenal statement was issued.... as single women when we are desiring to marry a particular man we should ask ourselves " Would you want that man to be the head of you and make ALL of your decisions?"such a simple question, yet still so profound..........I think back on all of the relationships that I have had and I thank God that we spared me from marrying some of the men from my past, because it is crazy to think that those men would have been the leaders of our household....

Another interesting thought is this, marriage does not change anyone, so if you were to marry that man today, and him not change a lick would you be happy for the rest of your life, or would you be miserable.......

Love is not enough....it takes much more to make a marriage work.......:eek:

hmmm(wondering what book she reading?):D

But I wanted to piggy off of what SE said.

Okay bare with me this may seem young and silly to you...I try to equate trust in God's order this way to young girls/women christians when I am explaining how it feels to let go of that control and trust someone elses decision.

I ask my cousins, have you ever been in a huanted house with noooo light? There is a point when you realize that you may not like this and want to turn back and do something else entertaining. You keep going though and the darkness and anticipation of something scary is almost painful. You hear the scary noises and maybe feel something eerie, but you keep going until you come out in the end. This is the funny part.... How much screaming at the top of your lungs did you do? How much grabbing hold to other people and pulling them around to comfort yourself did you do(even if unnerved them). How many silly things did you say while you were frightened out of your mind because you felt you didn't have control over what was going to happen next?...but in the end when you come out and see the daylight or the friends and family smiling to see your reactions, DONT YOU FEEL JUST A LITTLE SILLY for the way you were acting?...i know I always did.
What i was trying to convey is that SOMETIMES(not alway all), Your hubby is going to convince you to take a trip into the unknown and you gotta trust FROM THE BEGINNING thatyou will come out fine in the end. So that family and people around you can see in the end that you trusted God and you don't feel like a total flake in your over reactions and unstability to your husband

tlr
03-15-2007, 03:15 PM
it takes God to change a man....if a woman can understand this before marriage, she's got a good foundation...TRUST& OBEY is the hardest principle i'm finding as a christian wife...such a struggle! But God is in control!

who are you trusting and obeying?
peace

Single Eye
03-15-2007, 04:14 PM
who are you trusting and obeying?
peace

for real? God of course!! Knowing that He is ultimately in control over ALL!!!!

:D this is a common struggle among wives because we tend to want to "fix" our husbands instead of allowing our husbands to be changed by the Lord, (which is the ONLY change that we really want for our husbands, because this is a true change, not just an adjustment so i don't have to "hear my wife's mouth")

Single Eye
03-15-2007, 04:15 PM
hmmm(wondering what book she reading?):D

But I wanted to piggy off of what SE said.

Okay bare with me this may seem young and silly to you...I try to equate trust in God's order this way to young girls/women christians when I am explaining how it feels to let go of that control and trust someone elses decision.

I ask my cousins, have you ever been in a huanted house with noooo light? There is a point when you realize that you may not like this and want to turn back and do something else entertaining. You keep going though and the darkness and anticipation of something scary is almost painful. You hear the scary noises and maybe feel something eerie, but you keep going until you come out in the end. This is the funny part.... How much screaming at the top of your lungs did you do? How much grabbing hold to other people and pulling them around to comfort yourself did you do(even if unnerved them). How many silly things did you say while you were frightened out of your mind because you felt you didn't have control over what was going to happen next?...but in the end when you come out and see the daylight or the friends and family smiling to see your reactions, DONT YOU FEEL JUST A LITTLE SILLY for the way you were acting?...i know I always did.
What i was trying to convey is that SOMETIMES(not alway all), Your hubby is going to convince you to take a trip into the unknown and you gotta trust FROM THE BEGINNING thatyou will come out fine in the end. So that family and people around you can see in the end that you trusted God and you don't feel like a total flake in your over reactions and unstability to your husband

that's a good analogy sis!

all comes down to trusting & obeying (GOD!!! and HIS word!)

tlr
03-15-2007, 07:31 PM
for real? God of course!! Knowing that He is ultimately in control over ALL!!!!

:D this is a common struggle among wives because we tend to want to "fix" our husbands instead of allowing our husbands to be changed by the Lord, (which is the ONLY change that we really want for our husbands, because this is a true change, not just an adjustment so i don't have to "hear my wife's mouth")

I am curious why is it a struggle amongst wives and where does it come from. They need to be freed from it.

peace

Danielle
03-15-2007, 09:32 PM
hmmm(wondering what book she reading?):D

But I wanted to piggy off of what SE said.

Okay bare with me this may seem young and silly to you...I try to equate trust in God's order this way to young girls/women christians when I am explaining how it feels to let go of that control and trust someone elses decision.

I ask my cousins, have you ever been in a huanted house with noooo light? There is a point when you realize that you may not like this and want to turn back and do something else entertaining. You keep going though and the darkness and anticipation of something scary is almost painful. You hear the scary noises and maybe feel something eerie, but you keep going until you come out in the end. This is the funny part.... How much screaming at the top of your lungs did you do? How much grabbing hold to other people and pulling them around to comfort yourself did you do(even if unnerved them). How many silly things did you say while you were frightened out of your mind because you felt you didn't have control over what was going to happen next?...but in the end when you come out and see the daylight or the friends and family smiling to see your reactions, DONT YOU FEEL JUST A LITTLE SILLY for the way you were acting?...i know I always did.
What i was trying to convey is that SOMETIMES(not alway all), Your hubby is going to convince you to take a trip into the unknown and you gotta trust FROM THE BEGINNING thatyou will come out fine in the end. So that family and people around you can see in the end that you trusted God and you don't feel like a total flake in your over reactions and unstability to your husband



Thank you Lisa for this analogy....TRUST is something that still has me tied up...but I am growing......

Devin
03-16-2007, 05:43 AM
I am curious why is it a struggle amongst wives and where does it come from. They need to be freed from it.

peace

*giggles* hey...tlr...why are you even on the thread that was clearly made for the ladies? *giggles*:p

btw,i think you might have missed SE's point.the struggle she and other wives might deal with is an issue that is better to deal with when All Trust is in Christ.

tlr
03-16-2007, 08:30 AM
*giggles* hey...tlr...why are you even on the thread that was clearly made for the ladies? *giggles*:p

btw,i think you might have missed SE's point.the struggle she and other wives might deal with is an issue that is better to deal with when All Trust is in Christ.

devin, here is a golden nugget whenever women are talking you would do well to listen which is what i am doing.

To take up your point "all trust in christ" is great in theory but does not help with the day to day process. What is the practical solution to help many wives get over these chalenges that they have in their lives. How can we as husbands help?.

peace

Single Eye
03-16-2007, 09:02 AM
I am curious why is it a struggle amongst wives and where does it come from. They need to be freed from it.

peace

This is the effect from original sin:
Gen 3:16 ......"Your desire shall be for your husband and he shall rule over you."



we'll only be freed from this by the gospel!!

Single Eye
03-16-2007, 09:04 AM
devin, here is a golden nugget whenever women are talking you would do well to listen which is what i am doing.

To take up your point "all trust in christ" is great in theory but does not help with the day to day process. What is the practical solution to help many wives get over these chalenges that they have in their lives. How can we as husbands help?.

peace

actually our young dear brother is RIGHT ON!!!! yes, all of our hope lies in the GOSPEL the stronger we understand the depths of the gospel, the greater our trust in the Lord becomes......our hope is to be in CHRIST ALONE!

tlr
03-16-2007, 09:46 AM
actually our young dear brother is RIGHT ON!!!! yes, all of our hope lies in the GOSPEL the stronger we understand the depths of the gospel, the greater our trust in the Lord becomes......our hope is to be in CHRIST ALONE!

That is great but that is a statement of truth. I am more interested how you work that out in practice.

peace

Danielle
03-16-2007, 01:02 PM
i'm at work now, and I just got a call from a lady about her appt. And she jokingly asked me "sheesh, why do we have husbands anyways" and the first thing that came to mind and I told her was to "love, honor and obey"., lol, she laughed and said "I didn't vow to do that, only to love and cherish unitll death". And it is funny how the world percieves what a marriage is, just loving and cherishing is not enough.... that is why the divorce rate is so high. First off, love done right is found in 1 Corinthians 13, and the world(sinners) have yet to operate to the fullest of that love, so of course their marriages would have a high probality of failing. Submission is key, as well as to deny yourself, and learn to honor your spouse above yourself are not written in those American standard vows, there is absolutely nothing in those vows that causes conviction, or I'm I wrong?

Single Eye
03-16-2007, 01:08 PM
That is great but that is a statement of truth. I am more interested how you work that out in practice.

peace

in practice? we grow more and more in love with our savior...we read the bible, we spend time with the Lord in prayer.....we learn everyday how the gospel pertains to our lives....there's no opinion anyone can give that works greater than the prescription of scripture...and that is that we have all things pertaining to life and godliness IN THE KNOWLEDGE OF CHRIST.

tlr
03-16-2007, 01:19 PM
in practice? we grow more and more in love with our savior...we read the bible, we spend time with the Lord in prayer.....we learn everyday how the gospel pertains to our lives....there's no opinion anyone can give that works greater than the prescription of scripture...and that is that we have all things pertaining to life and godliness IN THE KNOWLEDGE OF CHRIST.

that is true, but that is apllied to men and women differently. In particularly in the western world. I remenber when i was single and the attitude from some christian women was, how can i put , not in accordance with those scriptures. This has never really been address hence we are left with challenges.

peace

lisajames96
03-16-2007, 01:30 PM
i'm at work now, and I just got a call from a lady about her appt. And she jokingly asked me "sheesh, why do we have husbands anyways" and the first thing that came to mind and I told her was to "love, honor and obey"., lol, she laughed and said "I didn't vow to do that, only to love and cherish unitll death". And it is funny how the world percieves what a marriage is, just loving and cherishing is not enough.... that is why the divorce rate is so high. First off, love done right is found in 1 Corinthians 13, and the world(sinners) have yet to operate to the fullest of that love, so of course their marriages would have a high probality of failing. Submission is key, as well as to deny yourself, and learn to honor your spouse above yourself are not written in those American standard vows, there is absolutely nothing in those vows that causes conviction, or I'm I wrong?

lol...That woman was telling you the truth, she didn't vow that. I'd like to see how her hubby scores on the "hen-pecked-O -meter" though...j/k...

I like to run into women that say that now adays, because I can give them scripture AND a testimony. God always get the glory in mine because I was that lady 5 years ago if you were to walk up to me talking that obey mess...lol. However, for some women it can get frustrating to constantly live a vow of obedience to a lazy fool. It is the Holy Spirit that has to teach that woman to obey a man like that. If she want to honor God in her marriage there will come a time when a hubby goes all dictator on you, and she will have to walk in trust to God first( that keeps you from doing something that could be a sin, or stupid), then trust that her husband walks according to God's Law too.