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Shirverlion
10-23-2006, 11:46 AM
Morning y'all, so my mom called me the other day and said, "Hey son, I haven't heard from you in a while... you can't call nobody?" I told her I just spoke to her last week. I know I have been distant from my mom in the past because we had a rough relationship, but I've been really good at fixing the broken fences and making things better. Is a week really too long not to talk to your parents? Do any of y'all speak to your parents everyday? Give me some insight.

Quiet storm
10-23-2006, 11:49 AM
I pretty much speak to my parents everyday cause they both work at the church with me. My mom works in the front office (so I pass her everyday when I sign in for the day) and my father is pretty much my supervisor. When I was away at school I might have spoken to them only once or twice a month.

LaRosa
10-23-2006, 11:53 AM
i talk to & see 'em at least once a week... they live a few miles away... and we see each other @ church (plus they love seein the grand kids)

my wife talks to her mom several times a day (EVERYDAY)

lj.

Psalmist
10-23-2006, 11:54 AM
about once a week.....my parents can and will talk my ears off....so I know I need to set aside around 30mins to talk w/ them a week....and in order for me to do so, I need to have something to do in 30mins so I know I have a legitimate reason to get off the phone.

KPfaREAL
10-23-2006, 11:59 AM
My mom calls me every week or so. Only talk to my dad every couple of months.

J Hoyt
10-23-2006, 12:01 PM
Morning y'all, so my mom called me the other day and said, "Hey son, I haven't heard from you in a while... you can't call nobody?" I told her I just spoke to her last week. I know I have been distant from my mom in the past because we had a rough relationship, but I've been really good at fixing the broken fences and making things better. Is a week really too long not to talk to your parents? Do any of y'all speak to your parents everyday? Give me some insight.
Once a week would be great. My parents call me every three days and it drives me nuts.

I'll go out for a day and see on my phone "Missed 12 calls: Home, Home, Home, Home..." so I call back wondering what the big emergency is. "Oh, just wonderin' where you are..." Yeah, I don't call my parents anymore.

maaj
10-23-2006, 12:03 PM
Morning y'all, so my mom called me the other day and said, "Hey son, I haven't heard from you in a while... you can't call nobody?" I told her I just spoke to her last week. I know I have been distant from my mom in the past because we had a rough relationship, but I've been really good at fixing the broken fences and making things better. Is a week really too long not to talk to your parents? Do any of y'all speak to your parents everyday? Give me some insight.


Ya know ya peoples the best my man. Just remember that life is precious. I speak to my mother everyday now more than ever. I almost lost her to a stroke. Thanks be to God for his grace and mercy for extending her life, so I can show her how much I appreciate the things and sacrifices she had to make to raise four children by herself. Make the most of every opportunity when available.

Great question, Shirverlion.

TrueConvert
10-23-2006, 12:09 PM
I'm an only child, and there was a time before I was married that I spoke to them like 2-3 times a week, minimum. Now I'm married, so in the spirit of leaving and cleaving, it's down to 2x a week, maximum lol. I don't know that one should be expected, per se, to speak to their parents more than once a week. I mean, unless there's some sort of problem, once a week for adults to holla at their parents seems a plenty to me? I'm interested to see what others are saying though.

Shirverlion
10-23-2006, 12:10 PM
Ya know ya peoples the best my man. Just remember that life is precious. I speak to my mother everyday now more than ever. I almost lost her to a stroke. Thanks be to God for his grace and mercy for extending her life, so I can show her how much I appreciate the things and sacrifices she had to make to raise four children by herself. Make the most of every opportunity when available.

Great question, Shirverlion.

Thanks for the post man. Lately I've been really trying to suck it up and listen to my mom when she calls. My dad left her before I was born and she hasn't been in a relationship since that's 28 years. My sister lives with her but she travels a lot so my mom gets real lonely. She just wants to talk and have someone listen. Sometimes when we talk she asks the same questions over and over again or asks questions she already knows the answers too and it irratates me. I used to let my frustation show through the phone and sometimes I would hurt her feelings. I thought that it would probably be best not to speak to her that much to avoid us both getting upset. I know I'm wrong for that. Maybe I'll try to set aside a half an hour a week and bite my tongue, and just give her an ear to talk to.

Live@Baruch
10-23-2006, 12:10 PM
everday but then i still live at home ill let those who moved out or are married handle this :D

ctide
10-23-2006, 12:10 PM
now that im a parent, i have learned to talked to my parents alot more

literally, my kids are the most important people in the world

i go to my parents house every week for dinner, and see them briefly at least 1-2 times a week outside that

my wife talks to her mom every day on the phone

Chris, if your mom thinks a week is to long... then for her it probably is (different folks got different needs)

if you really wanna bless her, try to make it so she never gotta call you... beat her to it

her whole life will be bless cause of it, cause you literally are her pride and joy famo (especially since you a good dude)

my dad (in his 30s) wrote his dad a letter just telling him he loved him and quoting some scriptures

my grandma told my pops that he carried it around for over a year and would show his friends it... crazy thing is my grandpops never showed much love to my dad, but he def loved him and thought the world of him... just didnt know how to show it

to us grown up kids its just a a thing we gotta do, most of us wouldnt be devistated if we didnt talk to our parents for a month or more.... but for most our parents, we mean the world (even if they dont show it)

CHRISTion
10-23-2006, 12:15 PM
I can go 10 days without speaking to either one-matter fact, I only talk to my dad like twice a month (I don't live with him or near him-he's in Louisiana).

My mom and I live in the same city and we used to be a bit closer (I'd talk to her like once a week) now I can go like 2 weeks and then she'll be all like "You don't love your mother anymore? Why cant you call and check up on me?" and I'll be like "mom...it's not that...it's just... I'm busy"-and I know if she was gone, I'd look back at all these days and wish I had her to talk to... and it's not like I don't love them, it's just that's not how we were brought up (all lovey dovey, talk to everyday, saying "I love you" all the time etc)

Matter fact, I have a step sister & brother that I havent talked to in over a year, 1 sister in college that I talk to maybe twice a month, 1 sister in Kentucky that I talk to once every 9 or 10 days, and a brother that I pretty much only talk to over text message.

CHRISTion
10-23-2006, 12:17 PM
BTW-Brittney is the EXACT opposite of me. She talks to both parents EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. (drives me nuts) & if she doesn't see them at least once a week I think she will start having convulsions. I don't get it...but then again, she was brought up different than I was.

Live@Baruch
10-23-2006, 12:28 PM
I can go 10 days without speaking to either one-matter fact, I only talk to my dad like twice a month (I don't live with him or near him-he's in Louisiana).

My mom and I live in the same city and we used to be a bit closer (I'd talk to her like once a week) now I can go like 2 weeks and then she'll be all like "You don't love your mother anymore? Why cant you call and check up on me?" and I'll be like "mom...it's not that...it's just... I'm busy"-and I know if she was gone, I'd look back at all these days and wish I had her to talk to... and it's not like I don't love them, it's just that's not how we were brought up (all lovey dovey, talk to everyday, saying "I love you" all the time etc)

Matter fact, I have a step sister & brother that I havent talked to in over a year, 1 sister in college that I talk to maybe twice a month, 1 sister in Kentucky that I talk to once every 9 or 10 days, and a brother that I pretty much only talk to over text message.

i feel you on not coming from an emotional fam but if your mom wants you to call her then make the effort to even if u guys jus spend minutes on the phone with nothing to say to each other she will appreciate those moments it wont be easy but i think it will be worth it

eve
10-23-2006, 02:04 PM
Ya know ya peoples the best my man. Just remember that life is precious. I speak to my mother everyday now more than ever. I almost lost her to a stroke. Thanks be to God for his grace and mercy for extending her life, so I can show her how much I appreciate the things and sacrifices she had to make to raise four children by herself. Make the most of every opportunity when available.

Great question, Shirverlion.

Both of my parents are on my MIND basically every day. I speak to my dad once every two weeks or once a week. our relationship has always been great, but speaking each and every day simply isn't necessary. when i go up to NYC and visit, HOWEVER, we talk for eight hours straight each and every day. he's my daddy!

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c178/eanolen/daddyandme.jpg

for those who don't really want to hear from their parents (because of the busyness of life or whatever) i am going to offer you a statement that i want you to really think about and determine how you would feel if this were the case for you: i haven't spoken with my mother in five years.

she passed on two weeks before 9/11 and that was the biggest shock of my life. if you think your heart has ever been broken, you don't know heartbreak until your mom passes. the moral of the story should be obvious. i suggest we all obey the fifth commandment. one way to honor them is through consistent communication. after all, they prioritized us (as they were supposed to) for at least eighteen years and helped shape us into who we are. they don't deserve a disappearing act on our part.

peace, y'all.

ctide
10-23-2006, 02:05 PM
it's just that's not how we were brought up (all lovey dovey, talk to everyday, saying "I love you" all the time etc)

but God can break through that famo... be willing to feel akward for the seek of getting deeper with your fam

Brian
10-23-2006, 02:18 PM
Sometimes everyday a few times a day for a few days and other times maybe 2 or 3 times a week, it depends... My mom lives on the same street as me tho...

Brian
10-23-2006, 02:22 PM
A pet peeve of mine is when cats talk and see their friends from church almost everyday and talk to their parents like every 2 months or so... such a bad way to honor your Christian parents and such a bad witness to your unsaved parents...

clayfilms
10-23-2006, 02:28 PM
i try to sit down and talk to them face 2 face at least every two or three days..but sometimes i'm so caught up with what i'm doing and i don't..

as they get older i mos def try to make more of an effort to spend quality time with them and have prayed that the Lord will help me to not be so annoyed with their pleas for my time..

God keeps reminding me that commandment about honoring your parents still applies to grownups...

i know this can even be more of a struggle with saved cats whose parents aren't Christians...

Single Eye
10-23-2006, 03:06 PM
good thread!

i speak to my parents almost daily, they live about two blocks away from us so it's not hard to do. i see them several times throughout the week, but mostly it's for them to see their grandbabies! they are way more into them than myself, for real. it's odd to me...my relationship to my parents. we've never really had a strong bond, but since becoming saved the Lord has dealt with this aspect of my life and continues to do so, especially since i'm able to see them so much and i'm tried by my irritability and their seeming "need" to OVER spoil the young one (we'll see how-goes-it with our newest!) :) overall, i think that frequency doesn't matter as much as quality in terms of the time we spend speaking/seeing our parents. but i guess some parents may not "feel the love" and want to compensate by pulling more time..? i don't know.

CLER
10-23-2006, 03:58 PM
[QUOTE=CHRISTion]

and it's not like I don't love them, it's just that's not how we were brought up (all lovey dovey, talk to everyday, saying "I love you" all the time etc)

QUOTE]

agree with you on this... i still live my parents and we do see each other everyday and i say hi and bye type of thing with them... probably once in a while where i share her stuff about work or church... we weren't brought up to say i love you or be vocal about our feelings so it's hard for me... even to my sisters. my mom started saying i love you just recently and it's veryy hard for me to say it... i love them but i need to work on my talking skills with them.

Danielle
10-23-2006, 04:07 PM
just about everyday:)